In Honor of My Dad

It has been a couple of weeks since my 94-year old dad went to be with the Lord. He was much more than a father to my siblings and me. He was our mentor, our teacher, and our friend. I was privileged to share the following thoughts about him at his funeral:

Proverbs 9:10–11 says, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight. For by me your days will be multiplied, and years will be added to your life.”

My dad was a man who knew and feared the Lord. His reverence for God was evident when he prayed. I remember, even from my youth, the reverent tone of his prayers, a quality he maintained to the end of his days. His fear of the Lord served him well throughout his life, and was the foundation of the wisdom he demonstrated.

He was a highly respected leader in the church where he served as deacon, trustee, and adult Sunday school teacher. He was the one to whom many would go for wise counsel regarding decisions and difficulties. I, along with my siblings, turned to him often, confident that he would give us wise counsel. I have always admired and appreciated his wisdom.

Dad was a student of God’s word, and loved to teach or preach whenever he had the opportunity. He studied Bible for a couple of years at Bob Jones University, and even though he did not graduate, he made Bible study a lifetime practice. Because of his diligence and the enabling power of the Holy Spirit, he gained a deep understanding of the Scriptures and was a skilled teacher of the Bible.

Dad was one of the hardest working men I have ever known. He had a strong work ethic from growing up on a farm. He worked forty-one years for the telephone company, and for many of those years he worked side jobs to provide well for his family.

For a time, he held a part-time job as the custodian at Central Baptist Church, where we were members, when it was located on Crump Boulevard. He would take us kids along to “help” him clean, but we usually just played in the baptistry while he worked.

After we moved to Collierville in 1971, he did maintenance at the local car wash that was owned by his friend and co-worker, Benny, and he paid my brother and me, ages 12 and 14, to clean the car wash bays and parking lot at night.

A year or two later, when the private, Christian school we attended increased tuition, he took on a large paper route for The Commercial Appeal, getting up at 3:00 am seven days a week and delivering papers for about three hours before going to his full-time job at the telephone company. The four of us kids took turns going on the paper route with him. Our job was to sit in the back seat and roll the newspapers and toss them into the front seat as he drove and tossed the papers onto driveways.

In 1977, purchased the Townhouse Restaurant in Collierville from another telephone company co-worker, and successfully operated that business as a second job! We all worked in the restaurant together as we continued to learn the value of hard work, of managing money, and of eventually providing for ourselves and our families. We are truly grateful for the sacrifices he made and the example he set for us.

Dad was always generous to help us as adults whenever finances were tight, or if something needed to be repaired. I don’t think there is anything that he could not fix! I remember a time that he took vacation time to pull the engine and transmission out of our station wagon and rebuilt them right there in our garage. He was never one to pay someone else to do a job that he could do himself!

When grandkids came along, he was eager to spoil them with candy and other forbidden treats. During one of our visits to Collierville, Cheri walked into the kitchen and saw our two-year old Austin digging into a huge bowl of M&M’s, and Dad sitting there grinning from ear to ear!

As Dad grew older, he was sometimes frustrated that he could no longer teach Sunday school. However, he enjoyed any opportunity to engage others in Bible study or simply in conversation about the things of God. He recently told me that whenever he had the chance to talk about the things of God, he was unaware of the pain that plagued him, so I tried to engage him regularly in biblical conversations.

Dad was a wonderful husband, father, grandfather, and church leader. He taught many people to know and love God. One of my lasting memories of him is from my childhood. I remember on more than one occasion, as we would drive home from church, Dad, who was not musically gifted, would sing the chorus to an old hymn, probably unaware that anyone was listening. The course goes like this:

I love him.

I love him,

Because he first loved me,

And purchased my salvation,

On Calv’ry’s tree.

We miss Dad already, but we rejoice in the assurance that he is in heaven, in the immediate presence of our Lord and Savior whom he loved and served so well. We will see him again … until then, let us follow his example and love and serve the Lord faithfully!

Can You See God?

The 2008 recession and its aftermath was a difficult season. As I searched for meaning during the economic drought, I processed many of my thoughts through writing. It was therapeutic for me, and hopefully encouraging to others. I still go back and read some of these posts and find that they still speak to me. I published the following post in October 2011 at a time when many others were feeling the impact of the recession. Sometimes it’s hard to see God when you’re in the middle of the forest, and you may feel like he has abandoned you. If that is where you are right now, I hope this will encourage you to draw near to God and experience his grace as you endure the trial. - Joel

October 16, 2011

I left the North Point church service today with mixed emotions. Andy's message was on the passage in 2 Corinthians 12 where Paul says that although he pleaded with God on three occasions to take away the thorn in his flesh, God said no. He told Paul that His grace would be sufficient for him, and that His power would be made known in Paul's weakness. Here was Paul, a faithful servant of Christ, fully surrendered to serving God and advancing the gospel, and God was telling him to live with his affliction in order to show the power of God through his weakness.

It's easy, when things are going well, to acknowledge God and give him the glory for our success. That's the position we all want to be in. But what about those occasions, or those seasons even, when life has taken a turn for the worse?

As Andy pointed out, we have permission to ask God to change our circumstances. Paul did it. Even Jesus prayed for the Father to make another way to save mankind so he wouldn't have to endure God’s wrath against sin on the cross. God often grants our requests, and improves our circumstances. But sometimes he doesn't. He simply says "My grace is sufficient for you."

Do you believe that God's grace is sufficient? The service closed with a video of an interview with a family in the church. The husband was a successful builder and developer. His business was devastated by the crash of our economy, and he and his wife lost everything. They had gone from living in a beautiful home to moving in with his parents. They have prayed for God to restore them financially, but He hasn't. But instead of turning their backs on God, they have sought refuge in him and have experienced his sustaining grace. They don't know if their lives will ever be the same. But they do know that God's grace is sufficient for them.

I know that the encouragement in this message is that God's grace is always sufficient. But how can we not also be discouraged, knowing that God doesn't always choose to improve our circumstances? I believe the answer is this: Surrender everything you have, everyone you love, your entire world to God and trust him with all of it. That is what this couple chose to do.

I believe God was glorified by their testimony today. Though their future is uncertain, they see God in their lives.

Can you see God?

A Royal Wedding

Cheri turned on the TV at 5:30 this morning, excited for the opportunity to watch the events leading up to the royal wedding between Meghan Markle and Prince Harry. I could have put on my grumpy act, but I knew that for her, it was similar to my turning on the TV early in the morning to watch the British Open. Besides, I didn’t really mind. Royal weddings don’t happen every day, and this one was intriguing.

Meghan, a successful American actress, but a commoner in the eyes of British royalty, willingly surrendered her acting career, her own clothing line, and a successful lifestyle blog so she could marry her royal prince. Prince Harry, Duke of Sussex, is the son of Prince Charles and Princess Diana. He is a former military officer who served as a helicopter pilot for a time in Afghanistan, and is sixth in the line of succession to the British throne. Their marriage goes against the grain of British royalty, and their relationship was met with resistance and criticism by the British press. But, given the huge crowd that gathered around Windsor Castle this morining, all seems to be well with the Brits.  The wedding ceremony went without a hitch, and Meghan, now Duchess of Sussex, was a beautifull bride, demonstrating great poise throughout the ceremony.

Today, I was reminded of another royal wedding that will take place at some future time; that of Jesus Christ, the King, and of his bride, the church. Jesus is the supreme King, and he will marry his bride, whom he has adopted as his own. We, the church, are of common descent, born of Adam, born in sin. But by his grace, we have been made righteous, and by his Spirit, we are being sanctified so that when that day comes, he will present his bride, the church “to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish” (Eph 5:23).

Until that day, it is our duty and our privilege to participate with him as he sanctifies us. We participate by forsaking the sin that besets us and walking according to the Spirit. We are called to be holy in all of our conduct, striving for peace with everyone (I Pet 1:15; Heb 12;14). The day of our royal wedding will be a beautiful day, a day of rejoicing that will never cease. Every royal wedding before that day will pale in comparison. What a glorious day that will be!

Adopted by God

Some time ago I read a book titled Infinitely More, which is the story of Alex Krutov, an orphan who grew up in the Russian orphanage system. Alex tells the story of moving from orphanage to orphanage, never feeling as though he belonged to anyone. The orphanages did not have names. They were simply identified by number. Once each year he was issued a standard set of clothing. He ate his meals in the dining halls and he slept in dormitory style rooms. His caretakers were responsible enough to keep the children in order, but because there were so many orphans, they did not become emotionally attached to the children. Alex’s circumstances were better than living on the street, but he did not have a meaningful relationship with his caregivers.

Some Christians view their relationship with God as one of an orphan who has not been adopted. They know they have been rescued from the penalty of sin through the justification they received when they came to faith in Christ. But beyond justification, they have not experienced an intimate, loving relationship with God. They will try to conform to Christian standards of conduct by attending church, praying before meals and even becoming involved in Christian service. But there is always a fear of rejection if they don’t live up to what they perceive to be God's standards. They feel as though God is watching their every move, waiting for them to step out of line so He can swat them back into their place. They view every negative event or circumstance in their life as God’s punishment for not meeting His standard of conduct. It’s no wonder that many walk away, feeling as though God has abandoned them. They have never realized the fatherly love that God has for them.

John 1:12 tells us that to all who believe in the name of Jesus, He has given the right to become children of God. We are not merely justified (although, this is a significant act of God’s grace!). He has not brought us into an orphanage where we simply become one in a crowd of orphans. We are much more than that ... we are adopted! He has adopted us as His children, and we have the privilege of calling Him our Father. He invites us to draw near to Him and to approach Him "with freedom and confidence” (Eph 3:12). The love that God has for His children is greater even than the love that we have for our own children. 

J.I. Packer, in his book, Knowing God, states, “To those who are Christ’s, the holy God is a loving Father; they belong to his family; they may approach him without fear and always be sure of his fatherly concern and care. This is the heart of the New Testament message.”

Take hold of that message and grow in a love relationship with your Father. If you belong to Christ, you have been adopted by God. You are His child!